6 Weeks Post Partum

I had my 6 weeks post-partum checkup yesterday and was cleared by my doctor to resume all the activities of normal life. I guess that means no more excuses for not working out, much less not cooking or cleaning. Ha. When people have been asking me how I've been feeling, I always say how I feel is just a direct reflection on how Graham slept the night before.

Lovin' tummy time.

Bundled up on a cold night in the crib.

The last two weeks have been hit and miss with him in his crib/ room. Some nights he'll be fine until his 3am ish and 7am ish feeding, which seems totally doable now. Other nights he screams for hours for no reason or wants to eat every couple of hours. Those nights are completely exhausting, physically and emotionally. It's been hard for me to get used to listening to him through the monitor, instead of inches away from me, to tell how loud he's being or what his screams or noises mean. A few days ago, he started showing up in a different area of the crib than I laid him down. I have now watched him kick and scoot his way, while being swaddled, to cram his body up against the crib railing. He's also been trying to roll over when we lay him on the floor on his back and trying to stand up when we hold him. All that to say, swaddling him now that he's trying to be so active has started to make me nervous that he'll leverage his body from the side of crib to flip over and then suffocate himself since his hands and arms are restrained in his little straight jacket. So we switched to the sleep sack the other day, which I think has added to his trauma of being in the crib. BabyWise says he could be sleeping through the night at 8 weeks, but I'm not holding my breath. Our sweet neighbors were encouraging us last night that "this too will pass" and that all these hard, sleepless nights will be a blur and pass quickly. I don't want to wish this time away AT ALL but I wouldn't mind some consistent good nights' sleep. Oh little Grahammers, you're still worth it all. Andrew has been telling me I need to schedule in a nap to my day, every day. But it seems impossible to do with family and friends visiting, piles of spit-up laundry building up, dishes overflowing in the sink, nothing to eat for dinner, Christmas on the way, etc... Wow, do I sound like a stay-at-home mom or what? :) I actually am surprisingly loving my new role at home and of course the fact that Christmas is so close! A huge sanity saver for me has been Andrew being at home for the first month of Graham's life. I couldn't believe he got so much time off of work!! He was an awesome help, and it was just so nice to have him to talk to and share Graham's first moments with. He loved it, but is now back to work, so Graham and I are now trying to figure out what a typical day looks like now... if that even exists. Andrew and I are trying to learn what it means to parent together and what our "new normal" life looks like. These past six weeks have definitely made our marriage richer and harder. :)

Grahammers helping Daddy make Christmas cookies!

The picture that would've been on our Christmas card if I'd make one. :)
Merry Christmas from the Buckles!

The Grahaminator at 1 Month

Weight: 9 lbs, 2.5 oz. 

Height: 21 inches.

Clothing size: Newborn. 

Diaper size: Newborn.

Feeding: Nursing has been a learning experience for us both, as Graham baby is a little biter. After tons of help from the lactation nurses at the hospital and lots of practice, Grahammers is much improved. He eats consistently and well every 3 hours.

Sleeping: We began attempting a somewhat BabyWise schedule around 1.5 weeks, and he pretty naturally started following the schedule. At the beginning of each 3-hour cycle, he eats and stays awake for 1- 1.5 hours, and then sleeps for the remainder of the time. The first few nights at home were awful, with him screaming his head off forever and us having no idea what to do. After about 1.5 weeks, he began sleeping about 4 hours at a time at night for the most part, which was a huge relief, meaning I only get up once in the middle of the night to feed him. We occasionally have rough nights, but overall he's a pretty good sleeper at night. For his one month "birthday," we kicked him out of our room into his own room and his own crib. He took it like a champ!

Milestones: Being born. Getting unplugged from his jaundice glow worm. Cord fell off. First bath. Real tears when he cries. First bottle. First night in his room/ crib.

Likes: Snuggling!! Throwing his head around like a crazy man/ head-butting me when I burp him, his carseat and riding in the car, being swaddled, tummy time, being sung to, Baby Bjorn carrier.

Dislikes: Hiccups, the bottle, his bassinet/ crib (finally warmed up right before he turned one month).

Adventures: Lots of doctor visits at first for jaundice. Running errands/ Christmas shopping with Mommy. Church. Stroller rides around the neighborhood on rare warm days. Thanksgiving at Aunt Kristie's/ Uncle Mark's. Sitting on Santa's lap. The library. Meeting his family and all his new friends.

Before and After! 

We love our neighbors!
Only 8 days apart.

1st time in the stroller- a walk to the library.

At Thanksgiving- Too much turkey, Mom!!

Snoozed right through sitting on Santa's lap with his cousins.

What we couldn't live with out: The 5 S's from The Happiest Baby on the Block (Shush, Swaddle, Suck, Swing, Side). My mom and all her help Graham's first week of life. The Meal Train set up by our church. The Rock 'n Play from the Prentices- the only thing Graham liked to sleep in for his entire first month of life!

Kisses from Nonnie

This past month has been a blur of learning how to care for a newborn, parent together on the same team, trust God with our sweet baby, and try to get some sleep. It has been a steep learning curve, but we finally feel like we are somewhat learning our little boy and the new normal for our family of three. We love our Grahammers!!

One more look at his awesome hair. :)

Graham Baby's Birth Story

Besides screaming his guts out as the NICU nurses checked everything on his body,
Grahammers was pretty chill and bright-eyed right after birth.
11.8.12 at 4.46am, 6 lbs, 15 oz, 19.5" long

I love our little family.

Graham baby is a major snuggle bug.
I'm kind of obsessed with his hair and little dimple.

Graham Baby surprised us by coming four days early! I was completely convinced that he would be a few days late, since I had been measuring small the whole pregnancy and most first-time pregnancies don't come early. The week before I had him, I had lots of contractions on and off, but nothing consistent or super painful, so life went on as normal, still convinced I had lots more time. On Wednesday, Nov. 7, my contractions seemed to be getting more consistent and more uncomfortable. I still just thought my body was gearing up for the big day a week away. I cancelled all my plans that day and spent most of the day on the couch, timing my contractions, which still didn't seem to have a rhyme or reason. I remember talking to my Mom on the phone that day, and she predicted I would have Graham on Friday, which I of course thought was way too early! Ha. Little did I know. My doctor said not to call her until my contractions were consistently five minutes apart for an hour. I never got near that magic number until about 5:00pm that day. All of a sudden, the contractions became super painful and started logging in at five minutes apart. Finally! By the time an hour had gone by, my contractions were three minutes apart and they were so intense, I was crying through each one. I later learned that my pain was increased because Graham baby's head was already so far down inside me. I remember thinking, "This HAS to be it. If this is not labor, this is torture." Although it all felt very surreal, I had texted Andrew throughout the day, telling him how weird I felt and that he needed to pack his hospital bag as soon as he got home, just in case. He got home from work around this point and started throwing stuff in a bag as I called the doctor in tears. She, of course, told me to go to the hospital. I'd heard stories of friends in labor not being far enough along in the process only to be sent home from the hospital, and I wanted to make sure this did not happen to us! A neighbor across the street was outside and saw Andrew taking our bags out to the car. They exchanged greetings and he shouted,"My wife's in labor!" Weeks later, the couple told us they'd watched out the window as we made our way down the front steps to the car. I had to stop halfway and sit down because a contraction was so painful. At this point, the guy across the street had to walk away from the window, as his wife told him, "Those are contractions!" Ha. They don't have any kids yet, so it probably traumatized them. Oops. By the time we made it to the hospital, it was about 7:30pm, and I was in MAJOR pain with contractions about 1-2 minutes apart. I remember dismissing Andrew's offers of the circle drive drop-off and a wheelchair because I just wanted to get to a room with him as soon as possible. I even tried to convince him to bring in our bags so he wouldn't have to leave my side once we got inside, but as I crouched down by the car in torturous pain, he refused and half-supported/ half-dragged me towards the hospital doors. In the maternity elevator exclusively for use by women in labor, I had a contraction through which I had a death grip on Andrew's jacket as I doubled over, screaming/ grunting/ whimpering in pain. And then, DING! The elevator doors opened just in time for the expectant mothers' tour to be crowded around the elevator, being explained to the convenience of the maternity elevator. About 10-15 women with big bellies stared bug-eyed at us as they parted like the Red Sea so we could scoot by. I got the same look from the nurses' station as they scrambled to find a room near us since I could barely walk at this point. Once they got me in a hospital bed, the staff scrambled around me doing who knows what, as the only questions I needed answers to were, "When can I get the epidural?" and "You're not sending me back home, are you?" They assured me they were keeping me and the epidural would come soon. A blur of IV's, paperwork, questions, and I can't even remember what else took up the next hour as my contractions felt like they were breaking my body in half. I was the classic screaming/ crying woman in labor, but there was no drama queen here. This was REAL, horrible pain. I rated it at a 9 only because I knew it was supposed to get worse, which I couldn't imagine. I remember the nurse getting in my face, forcefully telling me, "Jaye. Do not lose control! You can do this! Blow through the pain! Come on!" (Andrew later adopted this approach with me too, and helped so much.) She kept me focused as the pain made me feel out of control crazy. I commend any woman who can bear this kind of pain naturally. Bring on the meds for me! The anesthesiologist finally came, and getting the epidural was actually much worse than I anticipated. I was hunched over, trying to keep still, but my left hand was swelling up from a misplaced IV, so the nurse immediately started switching it to my right hand, while I was of course in riveting pain of contractions. The epidural was slightly painful to get, but I remember screaming at one point, and the anesthesiologist saying, "I'm not even touching you!" I gasped out, "It's a contraction!" Ugh. At this point, I had no thoughts of the possibility of paralysis or whatever else could happen when an epidural goes wrong. I just wanted the pain to STOP. Finally about 9pm, my epidural was in and had kicked in (took about 15 minutes, instead of immediately like I had expected), and I was feeling good. It was unbelievable how I went from the worst pain in my life to not even being able to tell when I was having a contraction. The nurse became concerned as Graham baby's heart rate dropped consistently after each of my contractions, which she said was no good. She gave me an oxygen mask and had me try different positions with my body to see if he liked them better. She thought the umbilical cord could be wrapped around his neck, but surprisingly didn't freak me out too much. I'd gone through weeks of worry late in my pregnancy, and I just couldn't go there again. I wanted to trust God and trust the doctors/ nurses and just not allow myself to expect the worst. She encouraged me and Andrew to sleep for a while, since it would probably be a long night. Seriously?! Andrew napped some, but I couldn't tear my eyes away from the monitor, making sure Grahammers' heart rate never looked too alarming. The nurse was in all the time checking on me and Graham, and finally turned the monitor away from me so I wouldn't drive myself crazy. My dilation was moving along, my water finally broke (which felt like a balloon popping inside me- so weird!), everything was progressing nicely except little Graham's heart rate. Somewhere around 2:00-3:00am, my nurse had me do some practice pushes, but wouldn't let me do any more until the doctor came, just in case anything was wrong with the baby. Usually you push for a while with just the nurse, and then as they say, the doctor just comes in to "catch the baby." My doctor wasn't on call, so the other one in her practice came in around 3:30am. She did an awesome job, being a very calming presence in the room, and explaining they might have to vacuum Graham out if his heart rate did not tolerate me pushing. I was so glad she was there the whole time. I pushed for about an hour, which was longer than they expected the baby to be okay with it, and then vacuumed him out at the very end. Up to this point, I had not felt any pain while pushing (just pressure). The epidural was doing its job! But for some reason when she attached the vacuum to G's head and I pushed with it attached, it hurt! But it was over quickly as his head came out, followed by the rest of his body with one more push. I remember the doctor and nurse saying "Look down!!" I'd been pushing with my eyes closed, but I remember the moment of looking down and seeing them lift little Graham up as he came out of me. CRAZY moment. My baby!!!! I can still see him at that moment, tattooed in my heart forever. He wasn't crying as he came out, which of course scared me. The NICU people (who have to be in the room if a vacuum is used) immediately whisked him away to the other side of the huge room right after Andrew cut the cord. They did the standard checks as the doctor explained to me that the cord wasn't wrapped around his neck, but it was a really short cord, which probably was strained as he traveled farther down inside me, causing his heart rate drop. Andrew watched as the NICU people took FOREVER checking him as the doctor attended to me. Andrew was capturing G's first moments of life with the camera as I was calling out, "Is he okay? Is he okay?" I was DYING for them to bring him back to me, and they finally proclaimed him fine and healthy and put him on my chest. I couldn't keep it together and bawled as little Grahammers snuggled up against me, making it all worth it. I couldn't believe he was mine!!! I know I'm not biased or anything, but I'm pretty sure he's the cutest thing I've ever seen. :) I am so incredibly thankful to our sweet Lord for this precious little baby boy.

Our first snuggle time.

I stinkin love that little face.

Waiting to be discharged from the hospital after a blur of two days of
family and friends coming to visit and meet little Grahammers. Thankful for all the love. 

Home!!

39 Weeks- November = Baby Month!!

It's finally BABY MONTH!!!

How far along? 39 weeks.

Total weight gain? 22 pounds.

Maternity clothes? Just whatever will fit over my belly and go with my yoga pants. :) Mostly normal, with some maternity.

Sleep? No good. At all.

Best moment this week? November is finally here!! I remember making the sign above, announcing to Facebook that we were expecting in November. No matter what happens, he has to come out this month! Ahhhhhh!!! We can't wait!! Also, Andrew's cousin Stacey had a baby boy named Rigger, and our next-door neighbor had a baby girl named Charlotte. Graham can't wait to meet his new friends! Our week was also full of parties, weddings, and showers. We loved getting to see friends and family so often and celebrate their big moments, but I am totally worn out!!

Happy Halloween from the ninjas!
Cannot WAIT to dress up Graham next year!!

Miss anything? Energy. Breathing. Not having contractions. Not feeling like I'm going to pass out at random times. Lying on my back. Turkey sandwiches. Being comfortable. Zipping up my coats.

Movement? I think we're already fighting with each other. He attacks my insides, I push him away from my ribs, He keeps kicking, I try to contain him to another area of my stomach... 

Food cravings? Halloween candy!!! How can you not?? I didn't get any candy on Halloween, so the day after I was dying for some chocolate. I talked about it so much, Andrew finally gave in and we bought a big bag... that promptly gave me acid reflux. Bummer.

Anything making you queasy or sick? No.

Symptoms? Exhausted. Acid reflux from Halloween chocolate. Contractions. I have been a bit miserable the past few days with my contractions feeling like bad cramps, having no energy, feeling huge and uncomfortable... I told Andrew I didn't want to leave the house again unless it meant we were going to the hospital.

Have you started to show yet? Absolutely.

Labor signs? At my 38 week checkup, my doctor said I was dilated to 1 and 30-40% effaced. Not much, but it was progress from nothing at all last week! After she checked me, I had a ton of painful contractions for about 4 hours. Until this point, I'd only had a few contractions a day that didn't really hurt. But these were so strong and consistent, I was convinced it was baby time! But the contractions never really increased in intensity or were consistently 5 minutes apart, so I didn't call the doctor. Since then, my contractions have been stronger and more frequent in general. I am doing everything they say can naturally speed up labor- walking, eating spicy foods, etc. But I don't think anything is happening faster; I am just becoming more miserable. Ha. I was walking laps around Wal-Mart the other day when it was rainy and cold outside, and a guy worker asked if I needed help with anything, saying he'd seen me pacing. I laughed and said, "Nope, just trying to walk this baby out!" Pretty sure security should have been following me after that. :)  

Belly button in or out? Out. Ew.

Wedding ring on or off? On.

Happy or moody most of the time? I think I hit the miserable mark this week... Just ready to have this baby!!

Name possibilities? Oh little Grahammers.

Looking forward to? The Grahaminator's arrival of course!!! I cannot believe I will be holding our son in my arms so, so soon!!!

Surely someone shoved a basketball under my dress?!!

Thoughts from the Baby Daddy!

I saw an interview with the dad-to-be on another preggo blog and thought it'd be fun to get some of Andrew's perspective on my pregnancy recorded before this baby comes! Andrew played along, so here we go...

The hubs the night we found out we were preggo!
Celebrating at Cheesecake Factory.

(Jaye) What's been the best part of pregnancy?
(Andrew) Do I have to pick just one thing? Seeing the ultrasounds, watching Jaye's belly grow, reading to Jaye's belly, praying over Jaye's belly, getting the nursery ready.

What's been the worst part of pregnancy?
Not being able to snuggle as close to Jaye as I used to ... and watching Jaye be uncomfortable.

What are some of your favorite memories over the last 9 months?
Coming home and seeing everything laid out when Jaye first told me she was preggo (a onesie that said "I love Daddy," the 3 pregnancy tests that all showed positive, etc.); telling a random Menards lady that we were expecting (since we kept it a secret for the first three months, we were both dying, so we told a few random strangers, the Menards lady being the first person Andrew told- ha!); telling our Moms and calling family with the news; reading to Graham; praying for Graham; camping.

What's been the most surprising thing about pregnancy?
How much I worry about stuff- Is our baby okay? Is he functioning? Will Jaye survive? When other people go through this, I think everything will of course be just fine, but I lose all objectivity when it involves us.

What has been the hardest over the last 9 months?
Thinking of ways to serve Jaye and love her. It's an increased opportunity to do it, and I'm not great at it to begin with... But we didn't fight any more than we normally do.

Are you nervous about labor?
Yep. About something going wrong, of a certain person yelling at me, complications, being cranky when I don't get any sleep.

What are you nervous about being a dad?
Being cranky with no sleep, loving Graham and Jaye well, balancing all the roles of life.

What are you most excited about being a dad?
Teaming up against Mom... Doing guy stuff- rolling over, walking, shooting guns. The basics.

What kind of dad will you be?
Drill sergeant. No, just kidding. Hopefully warm and caring and thoughtful, one who mentors his little boy into a man. That's what I want to be.

How will you get through the sleepless nights the first few months?

Jack Daniels... Well, I took 4 weeks off... so I guess I'll sleep when he sleeps?

What has Jaye missed the most during pregnancy?

Turkey sandwiches.

What has Jaye most needed to hear in pregnancy?

That I think she's beautiful.

Is Jaye the stereotypical preggo woman?
Nope. I expected ridiculous mood swings- crazy lady, sobbing all the time. She hasn't been like that.

Has Jaye had any crazy preggo hormone moments?

I think there were two times. I remember thinking that this was probably a pregnancy moment and smiling, even though she was really mad. It was okay the next morning. I don't remember what it was, but I remember thinking, "Why are we fighting?"

How did you feel when Jaye told you she was preggo?

Similar emotions to that of a deer who sees headlights. Unsure if he should step out of the way or stand still.

(He was totally shocked at first, but obviously warmed up to the idea quickly as we snapped these photos right after I told him the news and has been so, so excited ever since. :))

How did you feel when you first felt Graham kick?

Excited.

What baby chores will you help with? 
Financial support.

What baby chores will you dread?
I know I won't have to change any diapers, but if I had to... that's what I'd dread.
(In case you haven't picked up on Andrew's sense of humor yet... We're both laughing at this point because we KNOW this is not true! He will be helping with the diapers. Period.)

What's your favorite baby item you've received/ bought?
Cloth diapers. Video monitor. Crib.

How do you think life will change once we have a baby?
I'll have to be less selfish. I'll have to slow down.

What do you think Graham will look like?
My eyes, Jaye's smile, our hair.

What do you hope little Graham is like in general?
Persistent with things he tries to do/ goals he sets; caring; unwavering in his faith; strong in all senses of the word.

What are you most looking forward to once Graham is born?

Just having him in my arms. Looking at him, talking to him, singing to him.

One of my fav preggo pic's of all. Andrew LOVES reading to Grahammers.

The start of our cloth diaper collection.
Andrew is seriously so excited about this!


Andrew really has been the BEST through this whole experience. 
So patient, supportive, helpful... I couldn't have asked for more.

38 Weeks- READY.

38 Weeks- Feeling like Grahammers is taking over my whole body!
They're now saying he's an average-sized baby (instead of little),
and my belly can definitely tell. :)

How far along? 38 weeks.

Total weight gain? 22 pounds. For some reason there were occasions to have dessert like every night this week.. and Graham baby loved it. :)

Maternity clothes? Whatever works. I didn't buy a maternity coat since I'm from Tennessee and you don't wear a coat before mid- November (my due date). But since it's been freezing here for a month and I'm stubborn, I've just been making my normal coats work. Some will barely zip around my belly, some I button at the top only. I know I look pretty ridiculous with both, but I refuse to give in for the last two weeks.

Sleep? Sleep hates me. 

Best moment this week? Obviously hearing that everything is okay with little Grahammers!! We are just so, so thankful. His growth and development are fine and normal, his brain is fine and normal. Still breathing huge sighs of relief. Whew. At my normal 37 week appointment, my doctor told me that according to the prenatal specialist's measurements, Graham is measuring in the 50th percentile overall (his whole body), so he might not be quite the little baby we were expecting! He's officially moved up from everyone saying "he's just a little baby" to average size! Go Grahaminator! Just a late bloomer. :) I feel like he is taking up my whole body these days, with his head so far down but his feet still kicking up in my ribs. They are estimating his weight at 6 lbs, 7 oz now but admit ultrasounds aren't super accurate at weight. I wasn't dilated at all this week (first time they checked me), which my doctor says is no big deal and that lots of people don't dilate until they go into labor.

Miss anything? Having energy. I'm just really tired these days. Bending over easily. 

Movement? Now that he's been in the same position for over a month, it's so fun knowing which of his body parts are wiggling around. Before then, it was hard for me to identify what exactly he was doing in there! These days, he mostly shakes and pushes his little butt around on one side of my tummy and kicks on the other side.

Food cravings? Major sweet tooth this week.

Anything making you queasy or sick? No.

Symptoms? I have energy during the day, but completely collapse after work in the afternoons. Really tired. My stomach just hurts sometimes now- partly because of the contractions, but partly because of Graham too. I keep saying it feels like he's "burrowing" his little head down, using his whole body weight, inside me, a lot of the time.

Have you started to show yet? Oh yeah.

Labor signs? Still just Braxton-hicks contractions occasionally. 

Belly button in or out? It's pretty much out now. Gross.

Wedding ring on or off? On.

Happy or moody most of the time? Soooooo happy Graham baby is okay!!!

Name possibilities? Graham baby!!!

Looking forward to? Getting this show on the road! Now that I know he's fine, I'm ready!! But still freaking out about labor, of course. :) I've read up and now can't think about it too much. Graham has a second cousin on Andrew's side scheduled to make his/ her appearance today, so we cannot wait to meet that sweet baby!! And our next door neighbor's due date is today, so we keep waiting to see them rush out to the hospital. Babies all around! I also seriously cannot wait to dress Graham up in ridiculous costumes for Halloween next year. I told Andrew I was going to buy the cutest dinosaur, monkey, puppy, whatever costumes I could find in after-Halloween clearance sales and just dress him up every day for the first few weeks of life anyway. So stinkin cute.

I guess I'll settle for Thanksgiving being his first holiday...
with a turkey on his little butt. :)

And everything is just fine!!! WHEW.

Hard to see here, but everything on the ultrasound pic's and
these measurement charts are healthy and normal for Graham baby!!!!

I thought about waiting til my 38 week blog post, but I have gotten so many messages since my last post, I thought I'd go ahead and update everyone. I headed to the appointment with the prenatal specialist this morning with a heavy heart, desperately clinging to the promise "He alone is my refuge, my place of safety. He is my God, and I trust Him." Psalm 91:2 NLT. I had told Andrew last night, after he held me and prayed for our Grahammers, that deep down I really sensed that our little peanut was just fine. But after I arrived to the appointment and started reading all the paperwork about what the ultrasound could reveal being wrong with my baby, it was hard to breathe again. IS HIS BRAIN OKAY??? Does he have major developmental issues? Will I have to deliver him early... like today??! The ultrasound tech lady saved me from my thoughts spinning out of control and began to roll over my belly for what seemed like forever, taking pictures, examining things from every angle, measuring, measuring, measuring... Will this ever end? I'm not sure if it was the nerves or Graham baby squishing my lungs/ slowing my blood flow from lying on my back that long, but I got really light-headed and almost passed out, which has become quite the norm during pregnancy. Ugh. She sat me up for a while, doused me with cold, wet rags, and then we proceeded. She warned me that the doctor might want to re-check me just because he's very thorough, not because it meant anything was wrong. She left and I waited, trying not to hyperventilate. I knew from many, many ultrasounds this pregnancy that she wasn't allowed to interpret anything for me until I talked to the doctor. Finally, he walked in, introduced himself, and then immediately said the sweetest words I've ever heard: "Everything is just fine with your baby." He said Graham baby's head is crammed down really far into my pelvis, which makes it really hard to measure accurately (which was an issue from my normal doctor's office since the beginning of all this, weeks ago). But that Graham's head width, head circumference, and everything else on his body is falling in the normal range, so there is absolutely nothing to be concerned about. We went through all the charts and measurements, and he assured me everything looks healthy and fine. He said he'd send the report back to my doctor, and that I could proceed like normal over the last few weeks of my pregnancy. PRAISE GOD FROM WHOM ALL BLESSINGS FLOW!!!! As I called Andrew, I couldn't hold back the tears of sweet relief and gratitude. I'm still crying just writing this post. Pregnancy hormones or basket case mom? Time will tell. :) Jesus, thank you, thank you, thank you for your great mercy in developing our little boy. 

37 Weeks- Full Term!! And Worrying...

Wow, look at that belly grow!!! Pre- baby bump to 37 weeks... full-term baby boy!

How far along? 37 weeks. Officially full term! We made it!!

Total weight gain? 20 pounds.

Maternity clothes? I heart sweats. Here are my favorite yoga pants from Target that have gotten me through the third trimester. It's really my only pregnancy must-have. Mine are black, and I'm wearing them in the pic above.
http://www.target.com/p/mossimo-supply-co-juniors-yoga-pant-oxford-blue/-/A-14102280#prodSlot=medium_1_1&term=yoga%20pants

Sleep? Not sleeping very well at night. Needing naps a lot.

Best moment this week? Welp I wish we were celebrating being at full-term, but instead we're back to Worry-land again. After my 36 week appointment and ultrasound, my doctor told me that her gut instinct says that everything is fine with Graham baby, but she wants to be sure. So she is sending me to a prenatal specialist with better ultrasound equipment to remeasure his head, check blood flow to the brain, etc. They couldn't get me in for several days, so my doctor had me come back to see her the next day. They monitored his heartbeat and movement for a while and said everything looks great with that. So now we just have to wait a couple more days to hear what the specialist says. Andrew has been great through all this, taking the role of being the strong one since I have been more of the disaster. :) I know this is the first of many, many times I will not be able to do anything for my child, but trust God and wait. It's just so hard.

Miss anything? Oh you know, normal things. Sleeping and breathing mainly. :)

Movement? He is always kicking up my ribs these days. I think he's gotten taller in the last couple weeks. Ow.

Food cravings? The usual.

Anything making you queasy or sick? No.

Symptoms? Weak and light-headed at random times. Tired.

Have you started to show yet? Mmmm-hmmm.

Labor signs? Lots of Braxton-hicks contractions. Still not hurting, just tightening up my whole belly. So crazy my body knows just what to do to have this baby! God really did design it this way.

Belly button in or out? Still flat...

Wedding ring on or off? On.

Happy or moody most of the time? Anxious.

Name possibilities? Graham baby!!!

Looking forward to? Hopefully getting some concrete answers from the specialist that Grahammers is just fine.

36 Weeks- One Year Anniversary & Nursery Progress!

36 Weeks- Feeling huge!!!

How far along? 36 weeks. Nine.months.pregnant... Wow. It really has flown by. Peeing on the stick (okay, okay, on three sticks just to make sure!) and telling Andrew we're going to have a baby seriously does not feel very long ago.
Total weight gain? 19 pounds... and feeling huge.

Maternity clothes? Just wanting to be comfy all the time now. Bundling up in old sweats mostly.

Sleep? I've been having to get up to go to the bathroom a lot more lately in the middle of the night. And having multiple crazy, vivid dreams each night. Needless to say, sleep isn't great, and I need a nap about every other day now.

Best moment this week? Celebrating our one year anniversary! Can't believe we had a baby celebrating with us. :)

1 year ago today! We said "I do" in Jamaica on 10.15.2011.

Well the chalkboard writing didn't really show up,
but here we are celebrating our anniversary this past Saturday night.

Anniversary dinner out with the hubs.
I sure do love being married to him!!

Our "wedding cake" (shower cake, whatever :)) from a year ago...
Not bad after being in the freezer that long!

Nursery progress! Andrew and I have been working so hard at painting, cleaning, organizing, buying, returning, washing, decorating, hanging, rearranging everything in Graham baby's room. It's starting to look like we're actually going to put a baby in there! Finally! Here are some pic's of some of our progress...

We love our crib!! We ordered online from Target, and it is exactly what we wanted.
The personalized canvas is just waiting there until I decide what else to hang on that wall with it.
And our video monitor is peeking out from behind the lamp. We are so excited about that thing!!

The curtains are navy blue and light blue,
the only "theme" we really have going on in here.

Glider, changing table, and bookshelf full of sweet blue things. :)

Graham baby will have no problem being clothed for the first year of his life!
Thanks to all our friends and family who stocked us up. :)

The next item on the to-do list: figure out what to do with this wall of built-ins.
I love the storage but can't figure out what to do with it.
We removed all the built-in doors to paint the walls brown,
and I'm thinking I'll paint them white with brushed nickel knobs. Any suggestions?

Also, my 36 week appointment isn't for a couple more days, so we will see what the ultrasound reveals this week. Trying not to be anxious about it.

Miss anything? Sleeping through the night. Breathing normally. BEING COMFORTABLE.

Movement? He is passing his kick counts like a champ! My doctor says his movements are his one voice to me to tell me everything is okay, so each day he seems to be screaming that he's doing just fine. :) I can tell he is getting bigger and stronger as he seems to be staking more and more claim in my stomach as days go on. Ouch.

Food cravings? I've been wanting more comfort foods lately- sweets and carbs. Not sure if it's from the weather or my nerves or what... Or maybe the fact that I made a surprisingly amazing pumpkin cake and it just really wants to be eaten... But how could you not crave that??

Anything making you queasy or sick? No.

Symptoms? The usual. I get very weak, shaky, and light-headed when I'm really hungry these days, feeling like I'm going to pass out. I'm going to have to start stashing snacks in my purse more often. Pretty tired this past weekend. But honestly, the third trimester hasn't been that bad for me overall. My first trimester was the worst by far- every day nausea and total exhaustion. Sooooo glad that's over.

Have you started to show yet? Yep.

Labor signs? I didn't really think I had been feeling anything, but in the past 24 hours, I think I've been recognizing some Braxton-hicks (practice) contractions. They don't hurt, but my belly just gets really tight and hard all over. Weird.

Belly button in or out? Flat. Have I mentioned how much I hate belly buttons in general?? Ready to not think about mine anymore...

Wedding ring on or off? On.

Happy or moody most of the time? Still happy but anxious.

Name possibilities? Not feeling creative with the nicknames right now.

Looking forward to? Hopefully a good report after the ultrasound this week...

Baby Checklist:

• Paint nursery
• Decorate/ organize nursery
• Finish built-ins wall in nursery
• Wash everything that might touch Graham baby's skin
• Pack hospital bag 
• Pick pediatrician
• Install car seat
• Clean out freezer
• Hospital tour
• Read up on childbirth, etc.
• Finalize (buy, return, exchange) baby gear

Things I thought I'd never hear myself say... But here they are coming out of my mouth. Often.

• "My alarm hasn't gone off yet this morning, but I'm so uncomfortable, I'm just going to go ahead and get up."
• "I'm going to use cloth diapers for our baby."
• "I'm really hungry. I think I want some meat."